BOOK REVIEW: A PARENT’S GUIDE TO PREVENTING HOMOSEXUALITY

Figure 1A: The controversial text.

Today’s Battle: The Next Vatican II

In the Vatican 2 council, the Latin Rite of the Catholic Church completely eroded from the inside out. This had a knock on effect on the rest of those under the authority of the Catholic Church. All former colonies to Rome that were given a vassal status (i.e. emancipated or liberated) still had to pay homage through their religious institutions.

Nunneries collapsed, men left monasteries and the priesthood as a religious vocation. The Mass was tampered with and the Novus Ordo was produced. Gone were the stone altars and all of what was previously known as the Latin Rite of the church.

In fact so alien was the Church after Vatican II that when King Richard III’s remains were unearthed in Leicestershire and had to be re-interred, there was no one who could carry out funeral rites that he would have recognised while alive.

Jews and more importantly Muslims would be swept in under this Ramen Noodle religious stove top warm up. This however is the discussion for another time. We would instead like to discuss another trend just as destructive in the culture as Vatican II.

The new Vatican II is that homosexuality is from birth, normal, must not only be tolerated but accepted and celebrated, lauded and genuflected at for onlookers. I was on the frontlines when this war began in the United States and it was an ugly one.

Catholics – the trendsetters in this cultural relativism – sprouted some rebellious shoots that grew up and spread out seeds to address the damage being done. These included people such as sedevacantists, the recognise and resist movement (R&R), Dr. Janet E. Smith (along with the Catholic Answers channel) in her ground breaking lecture Homosexuality: Why Not?

Homosexuality: Why Not?  would later be incorporated into the irresistible package Sexual Common Sense (this 10 CD set made me see I was not alone in my research or hatred of this new underground culture that was coming overground). It is currently unavailable through her website as she is looking for a new distributor.

Figure 2A: The late Dr. Joseph Nicolosi. January 24, 1947 – March 8, 2017 (Photo courtesy of josephnicolosi.com)

Another one of the soldiers in this front line war is the later Dr. Joseph Nicolosi and his wife, Linda Ames Nicolosi. The book he wrote was revolutionary.

A Parent’s Guide to Preventing Homosexuality is one of the most important books the researcher could have on his shelf. Someone studying this issue in the culture requires this book and the following essential items:

Sexual Common Sense by Dr. Janet E. Smith

Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM–5)

Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM–I)

Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM–II)

Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM–III)

Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM–III-R)

Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM–IV)

Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM–IV-TR)

Homosexuality in Islam by Scott Alan Kugle

Living Out Islam: Voices of Gay, Lesbian, and Transgender Muslims by Scott Alan Kugle

Progressive Muslims: On Justice, Gender And Pluralism by Omid Safi

Return to the Spirit: Questions and Answers by Martin Lings

Islamic Homosexualities: Culture, History, and Literature by Will Roscoe and Stephen O. Murray

These will help the reader see the changes in the psychiatric community (brought on by legal pressure and not science) towards homosexuality in which the DSM eventually removed it as a disorder sandwiched between Transvestitism and Bestiality and/or other disorders connected with identity.

It also establishes how Spokesmen for Islam in the West have been slavishly ingratiating themselves to this new movement. They did this not only through sexual immorality/relativism but started first through religious relativism. This is why the books above are so powerful as well as useful.

As usual, the Spokesmen for Islam for the West depend on shoddy scholarship and rehashed arguments long disputed/discarded by opponents and even proponents of homosexuality. This is not the case in regards to Dr. Smith or the DSMs.

The presentations were clear, well set out and voluminous with sources in the proper places and also in context. It is in this understanding that we begin our book review of one of the Mount Rushmore heads of right thinking in the era of relativism: Dr. Joseph Nicolosi

The reading that I did of this book was difficult and also euphoric. Each chapter has left me with an exciting discovery and also schema to put into words. I felt that the book was so significant and replete with cogent arguments that I had to give each unit/chapter its due consideration.

1 Masculinity is an Achievement

This chapter focused by and large on the confusion faced by homosexuals about gender, namely their own. Drawing on his own knowledge as a clinical physician, Dr. Nicolosi put forward cases he has treated and also test cases on when identity becomes a problem, how the family provides the context for healthy and stable expression of gender and how one grows up secure in his or her gender.

Rites of passage that lead to manhood were given specific importance by the author and the lack of these is seen as one of the influencing factors (along with environment, i.e. the whole ‘nature/nurture’ disposition argument).

The author also gives tell tale signs of homosexuality in children and how interventions can be successful. Some of the pre-homosexual factors include domineering mothers and absent or submissive men. In the lack of a successful male role model, males begin to express the feminine traits or to atleast start to identify with them.

2 The Prehomosexual Boy

In this chapter, the prehomosexual boy is presented as being a whole galaxy of options when there is childhood gender-identity disturbance (GID) and it is left unchecked. When properly treated, the boy in this case will have the following solutions:

  • The opportunity for the child to overcome cross gender behaviour and the negative intrapsychic factors associated with it
  • A major reduction in social rejection by peers
  • Less likelihood of transsexualism (the belief that one is the opposite sex, often with the conviction that one must have sex change surgery to feel normal)
  • Less likelihood of homosexuality in adulthood

Also treated in this chapter are whether GID can be changed, if there is a “gay gene,” if sex change operations provide the solution to gender crisis along with the aggressive postulation that gender rigidity in children is normal and healthy.

3 Born this Way

The evidence for the ‘born this way’ doctrine is treated with a level of sensitivity and expertise that even advocates of homosexuality would respect although disagree with when he begins to lay out his case against it.

Dr. Nicolosi presents reasons for the sudden societal shift in views towards homosexuality as matters such as researcher bias in the social sciences departments, media filters that lean to hard left, biological factors and genetics playing a part but not being the determiner of one’s homosexual tendencies.

4 All in the Family

All in the Family gives a detailed analysis of parental response to homosexuality in children. I was surprised at how close the points were to the grieving cycle and the alcoholism progrommes I have read upon. Family responses include 1) denial, 2) confusion and 3) avoidance.

In addition to this, the author also puts forward his point that gender is not a construct but a biological affair in every sense of the word. One of the most destructive influencing factors towards homosexuality is marital discord/breakdown.

Cases where the mother was not just overbearing but overrid the father’s authority or consistently reinforced negative images about men are all influences/factors when observing homosexuals today in their adulthood.

There is a shocking number of them that come from broken homes or from families in which gender roles are bent, distorted or reversed. The women that are celebrated for being “single ladies” and “single mothers having it all” are not only the sole parent in the household for the founders of the Crips, Bloods, Vice Lords, Gangster Disciples, Latin Kings, 18th Street and so many others, they are also the architects of the homosexual explosion.

According to what the author has posited, the breakdown of families and loss of fathers has not given children (males in particular) any role models and those presented were either negative, dominated or put in such a bad light that the son (s) made their own way.

This may seem like an open ended, take no prisoners missile strike on single moms but the author actual gives solutions that can assist single mothers who have sons that desire to protect them from homosexuality. His three point programme is succinct but practical.

I have not seen any clinical data on the matter so I remain open to discussion and review. Also in the book are steps that fathers should/can take with their sons and how to push through barriers, re-establish relationships that were damaged or torn and proper ways to respond to gender non-conformity.

Included in this chapter was a touching four point gateway for fathers to stay connected to their sons that included tucking them in and reading them a story for just father-son time. I must admit it brought a smile to my face as a father that frequently reads bedtime stories to his children (yes, even the sound effects and other things).

5 Friends and Feelings

Isolation starts as a slow, noticeable process that should immediately be observed by responsible parents. The chapter begins with a scenario the author encountered and is ended with discussion about solutions and also troubleshooting. The rest of the chapter centres around giving children a strong masculine presence in the home that encourages them to express gender identity in a healthy way throughout their early development. One of the crucial things parents should put forward for healthy children is that they engage in sports on a regular basis.

This competition, back and forth winning and losing, solo and team sports bring out the best in them and give them confidence in their own gender group and show them how to express themselves, solve problems, work in a team, hone leadership skills and also act out aggression in agreed upon settings.

6 Confronting Adolescence

Keith’s mother giving an impassioned plea on the phone opens this chapter and it does not disappoint. Keith seemed to be headed in the direction of homosexuality involving a fixation he developed for an older man named Luke.

During the counselling session, Dr. Nicolosi allowed Keith to express his feelings, state his case and throughout the conversation Keith came to his own conclusion. Much of the pent up anger and defensiveness disappeared as now he was allowed to pen up.

These and other techniques figure in the chapter as a way to open up dialogue with a boy going through adolescence. With the gay identity becoming fashionable, the author decides to tackle the subject but also give a wider window into it regarding gay teen suicide, depression and mental health problems.

The statistics presented are staggering. One of the most powerful presentations is the fact that the author says much of the sexual behaviour being resorted to by these males is based on being emotionally started and requiring male bonding that is not sexual. Sex is merely being used as a means.

7 From Tomboys to Lesbians

By the time I reached here, I thought that there would be no presentation on lesbians as the book was initially top heavy regarding boy stuff. This chapter gives a lead-in to the female psyche along with factors that may influence a daughter towards lesbianism.

Again this goes back to the parents and how vigilant they are, how healthy the marriage is, how healthy the relationship is and the affection they show their children. The only other factor he mentions is that part of lesbianism is narcissism either in the parental structure or in the child herself.

There are checklists and therapy suggestions that are just as detailed for the girls as the author had done them for the girls. The chapter ends with a short section on the healing process for recovering lesbians.

8 The Politics of Treatment

I believe that this chapter is probably the most explosive is now religious sentiment is introduced. Any reader who was not angry previously will be now. That is, if you are a die hard opponent of dialogue about homosexuality and the role religion plays in society and civilisation.

It is here that Dr Nicolosi takes the discussion to new ground by insisting that homosexuality takes the human body away from what it was originally designed to do and that clinical science does not possess all the answers to the mysteries of life. To top this off he calls science limited. I can only imagine the death threats he probably received.

He rightly suggests that there is an ideological fanaticism that undergirds much of the homosexual movements aims and that even some homosexuals are not as intellectually interested in the talking points as the media would have us believe.

Then the coup de grace is the presentation that nature in its most fundamental level is heterosexist, meaning heavily stacked towards being straight in order to ensure the survival fo the species, whichever one that may be.

The book is timely in that it predictively lays out the unravelling of society that is certain to come by changing the meaning of marriage, gender, sexuality and morals/disabilities to suit an ideology that is en vogue.

9 The Healing Process

Coming close to ending the book, Dr. Nicolosi now presents stages in the growth process after highlighting the importance of affection/tactile relationships between parents and children and especially fathers and sons.

Therapy will be required but through interventions by the parents and regular sessions with the therapist, the spectre of homosexuality can be pushed back and conquered. Two of the keys to this are unconditional love and measuring success so that one can see the progress:

1) decreased effeminacy, 2) increased self-esteem, 3) increased maturity, 4) diminished anxiety or depression, 5) popularity with other boys, 6) diminished behavioural problems, 7) better relationship with Dad and 8) “Happy to be a boy.”

Clinical cases (names withhold/changed for the protection of the patients) are then given as examples to the reader that the methods work but also for practical instruction and implementation. The final word of this chapter are four guidelines to the parents looking to increase communication with their gender confused child.

10 A Mother’s Journal

As this is the closing chapter, it contains final advice from the mother of a gender disturbed son and his journey through the experience. Dr. Nicolosi is consistent in saying that there is no quick fix cure for this anomaly and that society offering a quick fix is only attractive for the moment. Prevention is better than cure is the Dr.’s regular refrain and the healing process requires loving, committed and ready parents who will step up and take the challenge.

Overall I found the book a good read, well sourced and written in an engaging style as if you were a close confident or friend of the author. Too much technical jargon and references to scientific journals would have been a turn off when treating such a controversial subject.

It is my hope that this book will serve as the legacy of Dr. Nicolosi and a fitting research that can be taken up by both sides of the divide in dealing with this most timely issue in the Anglosphere.

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